Duke it Out

My husband and I don’t fight.

I remember one time my Mom said that my ex and I weren’t communicating if we didn’t disagree every once in a while.  So, I’ll be clear: we disagree.  But we don’t fight.

In fact, the last thing I like to do is fight with my husband.  He’s way too sweet.  And even when I am right, I feel like a big bully if we get into it.  This is a problem, because, occasionally, I do get a temper.  And when I have a temper, I never really come out looking like the sweet woman I like to be around my husband.

I don’t know if this is hormones or just the ebb and flow of our relationship, but these are the things I’ve gotten mean about:

  1. When we’re walking with the stroller, and he walks so much faster than me that I am left trailing after him and the baby.
  2. Dish Network.  We’ve been trying to cancel it.  Turns out they really ARE difficult about getting out of a contract.
  3. The way that the dishes get stacked.
  4. The way the clothes are left for me  to hang up.
  5. The way he makes the baby’s diaper.
  6. The way I spend time after work.
  7. When it’s too hot at night.
  8. Finding a house where we won’t suffer all summer.
  9. Traveling.
  10. Our “junk” room (where he puts things when he doesn’t know where they go).
  11. When he asks where things are without REALLY looking.
  12. How much the baby sleeps.

Poor guy.  I know that I am being irrational.  I really thought before that I would love coming back to school at the end of the year.  Forget that.  The end of the year is really no fun at all.


When will my hormones balance out?  When will we be settled enough for me to stop worrying?  And when will I stop feeling bad for telling him, “I told you so.”  Funny, that used to feel so good to say to my sisters.  With Victor, I just get, “I know.”  It kinda takes the wind out of my sails.

Breath, Jania.  This too shall pass…

4 responses

  1. Sweet Jania …I love reading your blog! Some posts make me laugh and others, like this one, make me wish a person could send hugs through cyberspace!! 🙂 There are others who are much more qualified to comment on this topic but here’s my two cents. 🙂 Best advice given to us when we got married was to never go to sleep angry at each other. Also, this too shall pass but it will also come again so figure out how to let it go so no little grudges begin to grow. I’ve seen too closely how they slowly build a wall that after time becomes too big to break down. Thanks for sharing your sweet little family with us!! Keep up the good work…it’s a ongoing journey but such a wonderful one!! 🙂

  2. Hi Amiga,
    Yes…breathe! My pastor is doing a series on emotions. It is soooo good. He did one on worrying last Sunday. He basically said worrying is the most useless emotion one person can have because it doesn’t change the past and it can’t control the future. The only thing it does is ruin the present. How’s that for an afirmation?! School is almost out, and YOU GOT THIS! We ALL go through things with our loved ones, especially those we are highly invested in because that is our fabric. Know that you are loved by people all over the world because at some point or another your amazing qualities transcended and impacted their lives. These qualities and the love you have for people, your family, and God will always carry you through all.
    I love you amiga and I hope to see you this summer if you get time!
    Chin up!

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